Why Weren't We Friends in High School?

High School.

What is the first emotion you feel when you hear those words? Were you a cheerleader or involved in a sport? Did you have lots of friends and frequently date?

If you would have asked me last year about my memories of high school, I would have quickly - far too quickly - blurted out how I hated high school. My thoughts would have been tainted by the fact that my school closed its doors with only 9 weeks left my senior year. A shell of the school reopened in a different location under a new name. Half the students, staff, and faculty disappeared going their separate ways as they tried to somehow make sense of the nightmare brought on by lack of funds. The students received no senior yearbook even though we paid for them and they were ready for printing. And to this day I can't tell you which classmates I started AND finished with during my senior year.

Perhaps I'd recall my mediocre social life. I wasn't involved in any sports, so I didn't experience being part of a close-knit high school team. I had a few friends I was very close with at school and a handful of classmates who were more like acquaintances. The rest of my classmates I lumped together as "snobs" or "nerds" (how unsnobbish of me- ha!). For most of my junior high and high school years I attended a church youth group which consisted of three youth, including me. I had a few fantastic friends in my neighborhood I loved hanging out with. My dating life was nonexistent. I had lots of guy friends who only saw me as a friend. Various crushes I had went unnoticed and unreciprocated. My older sister left home, my school collapsed, I moved to a different neighborhood, and my two best friends and I got into a terrible, nasty, horribly painful fight. Blah. I hated high school. Thank God (and I really mean that) for grace and forgiveness as one of those friends and I restored our relationship a year after graduation and have been friends ever since. I really love her and treasure our friendship.

But those feelings of disgust at the mere mention of high school have relinquished their hold on my heart and mind. Over the past year I have slowly, reluctantly at times, reconnected with several high school classmates through facebook. And do you know what has happened? I actually like, really like, many of the people I never even spoke with when we were in school together. I keep asking myself, "Why in the world weren't we friends in high school?" I really like who these people have become, and maybe, part of it is also that I really like who I've become too.

This past weekend a number of us former classmates got together for an impromptu reunion of sorts. I had such a wonderful time both evenings. There were times of laughter and times of deeper, heart-felt discussions. We were real and honest with each other. I walked away grateful for the time we had together, and thankful I no longer carried resentment for high school years that paled in comparison to my expectations. I had a prick in my heart of how many years of friendship we lost out on, but so thankful for facebook, maturity, and second chances. I cannot wait to see these girls again. Plans for a reunion next summer will be in the works shortly. Until then, we have facebook.



Thanks to the Clothes Horse Neighbor

I have truly amazing neighbors. I doubt they come any better. My neighbors have one granddaughter who just happens to be exactly one year older than my oldest daughter, Sophie. Their granddaughter, Kailey, is quite a clothes horse. I guess in actuality her mother and grandmother are the ones who buy all the clothes.

When Sophie was one year old, Kailey's mom began giving me all of the clothes Kailey had outgrown. Huge plastic storage tubs arrived on my doorstep filled and overflowing. How could one little girl possess so many items? We received coats, shoes, socks, shirts, dresses, Halloween costumes, pants, shorts, jeans, swimsuits, hats, barrettes, etc. Many items were brand new. Most things were only worn once or twice. No piece had the chance to show wear.

The tubs of clothes have continued to march into our lives and Sophie's closet. Now that she is two years old, Sophie enjoys looking through her "new clothes" as much as I do. She squeals with delight and dances around while holding up each item. Of course she wants to try every single thing on as well. My twin girls, Piper and Riley, are now old enough to start wearing many of those first hand me downs.

Thanks to the kindness and generosity of my neighbor's daughter, all three of my kids stay well dressed. "I have never seen the righteous forsaken nor their seed begging bread". - Psalm 37:25.

What simple act of kindness can I use to make someone else's life easier?

Kindness of Others

It is humbling to need help. It is very humbling to need lots of help, especially being an independent type of person. This past year I had three major surgeries, each requiring 4 to 6 weeks of "no lifting" recovery. It didn't matter that I had three children under the age of two (twin newborns and a twenty month old). No lifting. period.

We were a family of five living off my husband's income. He had to be able to go to work. We needed lots of help while I recovered. I can't recall ever feeling so helpless and needy. Out of sheer necessity I contacted friends and family.

I learned that when given an opportunity, and when help is really needed, people rarely let you down. I have some amazing women in my life and am glad they are my friends.

When asked for help by someone who genuinely needs me, I hope I am always able to say, "Yes". Helping is inconvenient. Helping requires selflessness and time. Helping is a gift that answers someone's prayer. I am forever grateful for the women who said, "Yes", in my times of need. Although I'd rather give than receive help, I learned valuable life lessons through this experience. I appreciate the kindness of others.