I Quit!

This is the story of how I gave up what I swore I'd never give up.

Ode to Coffee

Oh, how I have loved you for decades my sweet and creamy friend!

When I was a child my parents spooned you into tiny plastic coffee creamer cups so my siblings and I could enjoy miniature cups of coffee. I felt special, included, and grown-up like Mom and Dad. It was a rite of passage.

When I was in college and frequently pulled all-nighters to study, you were the drink that kept me going. You didn't mind that my friends and I spent more time socializing than actually memorizing information.

I've spend thousands of dollars over the years perfecting you. I even received an espresso machine from my parents for my wedding gift.

When my mom died you were there for me like a liquid hug reminding me of all the times I'd seen my parents enjoy you.

How excited I have been every year when Starbucks rings in the holiday season with their Red Cups!

When I had three children under the age of two and couldn't remember what week, let alone day it was, you were there giving me energy to make it through another day or night.

I've fought hard to keep you in my life even when money was very tight. When I chose to become fit and healthy I threw out the cookies, ice cream, chips, processed foods, fried foods, and pop, but refused to let you go. I held tightly to you even though you made me dehydrated and made my workouts that much harder. I knew that I could do anything, make it through any day, complete any task, keep any diet or exercise regimen as long as I had you. I'd NEVER give you up! I placed you on a throne and called you sacred.

Until...

I realized you were my god. I truly, sincerely loved you, Coffee. I couldn't wouldn't make it through one day without you. I started going to Starbucks twice a day and longed for a third trip. If I didn't drink you by 10 AM, I felt nauseated by a horrible headache. Hundreds of times I've made all three of my little girls climb out of the car, walk into Starbucks, climb back in the car, and buckle their car seats, over and over and over and over rain, snow, sleet, or shine just so I could have my coffee.

You are not my god. You should not be my comforter, my reward, my coping mechanism, my strength to make it through the day. I should not depend on you or long for you throughout the day. I should not be having an affair with you.

And so I have decided...

I am not a victim. I can and will choose to stop being addicted to you.

_________________________________________________

I have gone ten days now without any coffee and couldn't be happier. Detox was no fun. I did have terrible headaches off and on for six days. I spent the first Thanksgiving I can remember without a cup of coffee in hand. Now I just drive down the street right past Starbucks without it calling my name. The first several days I was very tired without coffee but my body regulated itself. Now my energy level stays fairly consistent all day long. My appetite has decreased too since I don't have the cream and sugar spiking my blood sugar levels. I do find myself wanting to go to bed earlier at night which is a great thing.

Erica McMullen, my fitness boot camp trainer, is always asking our group, "Why are you here? Why are you doing this?" I had an epiphany that it was crazy to get up at 4:45 AM for boot camp three times a week "to take care of my body and improve my health" then go mess my system up with sugary, creamy coffee twice a day. No more! Once I decided in my heart that I was ready to quit coffee, I shared that decision with some members of F.I.T. Boot Camp. I did this to hold myself accountable to them. Knowing someone was bound to ask me if I'd had any coffee forced me to stay committed when the going got tough.
I know most people do not have the addiction problem with coffee that I do. Most people use it correctly. A cup of java can play a helpful role in giving one energy for a workout or the ability to drop some water weight. I am by no means suggesting others should also quit coffee. My husband still drinks it every day and it's not a temptation for me because I already decided I'm not drinking coffee -- period. I finally got to the point where I was able to give up what I swore I'd never give up and I gained confidence by following through with a goal I set out to reach. I've gained back the time I used to spend driving to and from the coffee shop twice a day. I've kept the money I would have spent on my drinks and can use it toward other things.

I don't feel deprived.

                               I feel free.

Jennifer's Berry & Green Protein Shake

This is the recipe I use for my daily protein shake. I know it's good for my body and I enjoy drinking it. I often bring the ingredients and my blender with me even when I travel.

3/4 C. Water
3/4 C. Crushed Ice
3/4 C. Almond Milk - (Silk brand unsweetened 30 calories per cup, found at Target) - 23 calories
1/3 frozen banana - 25 calories
1/2 C. Mixed Berries (I use Target's Market Pantry Frozen Triple Berry Blend) - 40 calories
1 large handful of fresh spinach, collard greens, or kale - 5 calories
2 teaspoons Flax Meal- 40 calories (aka "ground flaxseed meal" – grocery baking aisle)
2 teaspoons Smucker’s Natural Peanut Butter - 66 calories
1 scoop Designer Whey Protein French Vanilla – 100 calories



Put all the ingredients in a blender, berries last, and blend. Drink right away. This makes a very large shake. I try to talk one of my kids into drinking some of it. It will NOT be good to save for later.

299 calories



This shake has it all -- greens, berries, fiber, protein, good carbs, and good fat. I use Smucker’s Natural Peanut Butter because it’s the only one I can find with only peanuts and salt for the ingredients. I buy it at Target or Reasor’s. Other peanut butters include oils, like palm oil, that I don’t want. I try to keep ingredients as natural and as raw/unprocessed as possible. I use Designer Whey protein because it is one of the “cleanest” protein powders available in that it doesn’t have harmful chemicals many cheaper products have. The French Vanilla tastes great. I bought it at Akins for years, but just found a 4 lb. container on Amazon for $49 (which is only $8 more than Akin’s 2 lb. container). I buy a large container of organic baby spinach at Sam’s. It’s so much cheaper than buying spinach at the grocery store.

There you go. I drink this shake every single day and just switch up which fresh greens I use (spinach, kale, or collard greens). I’ll be honest, the kale is horrible, but the spinach and collard greens are great.

Potato to 5k in Five Weeks

If you read my last post, you learned that I have slowly lost 54 pounds. Well, just a few weeks ago I decided to start the Couch to 5k running program. It trains you to go from a couch potato to running a 5k (3.1 miles) in 9 weeks.

Prior to starting the program, I improved my cardio stamina by using my elliptical machine for an hour three to four days a week for one month. That paid off. I went from not running at all to running a 5k in just over five weeks. If you are familiar with the program at all, you know week five plays a nasty, yet glorious trick on you. You begin week five by jogging for five minutes, then walking, then jogging five minutes again, etc., but by the end of week five the program jumps to twenty minutes of non-stop jogging! No more intervals of jogging and walking. Well, I figured, since I ran for twenty minutes and lived to tell about it, I might as well skip all the rest of the training weeks and go for the full 5k. It worked!

Tonight I ran around a local park with a registered 5k trail. I ran (well...jogged) the whole 3.1 miles without stopping. It was hard. It was brutal. I really wanted to stop several times. The trail has lots of unwelcome hills but plenty of people and things to look at to help pass the time.

And, since I promised a current photo, here is the picture my hubby took of me tonight as I finished my first 5k. If you haven't read my last post, go look at my "before" picture to see how much I've changed during my healthy transformation. I'd still like to lose eight more pounds so I can weigh what I did when I got married, but I'm not really hung up on the number on the scale. I just enjoy being healthy and am thrilled to be fit enough to complete a 5k.

54 Pounds Gone!

I have slowly reduced my weight by 54 pounds (and counting). I'm frequently asked how I am losing the weight. I started my journey when my twins were a year-and-a-half old. I only wore stretchy yoga pants (and no, I didn't do yoga), so I can only guess I was a size 16. My size 14 clothes were very, very, tight. Ugh! I had three significant surgeries during my twins' first year (a C-section, an emergency hysterectomy, and a repair surgery) each of these required 8 weeks of recovery. That was next to impossible when I had three children under the age of two. With very little sleep I survived on carbs, packaged foods, and coffee with lots of cream and sugar. I was exhausted and miserable.

This picture was taken in June of 2010. This was my "aha" moment. I had no idea I was this large until I saw this photo. When I finally weighed myself I was horrified to read 207 pounds! I'm 5'8" and medium-boned, so at my thinnest, I'd still weigh more than a fine-boned more petite woman. But, come on! 207 pounds? That's ridiculous...and gross. I was very unhappy. It was an unhealthy image to give my girls too. I determined to model a healthy lifestyle filled with good food and physical activity. On a humorous side-note,  those of you who know me, know I don't curse, smoke, drink, or chew. Because of my prudish lifestyle, I find it very humorous to use the "Damn I'm Good" mug my in-laws have in their cupboard when we visit them in Nebraska. It's out of character for me and it makes me laugh every time I see it.

It is important to note that I was not fat because I had 3 kids. I can't stand when moms use childbirth as an excuse to be overweight and out of shape. Years later, if I'm still carrying extra weight it isn't "baby" weight. I am not a victim. Let's be honest and call it was it is -- personal poor choices that I alone own.

I do not use pills, shots, or surgery. I don't starve myself. I don't live at the gym. I am reducing my weight and regaining my health the slow, old-fashioned way:

• reduce my calories (though I don't actually count them)
• eat and drink nutritious food (and write down in a journal everything that goes in my mouth)
• sleep 
• exercise 30-60 minutes 4-5 days a week 

In future posts I'll delve into more details about my weight loss, but today I'll share with you my typical daily salad.

I buy large bags of Taylor Organic Romain lettuce from Sam's Warehouse. I eat a salad every day for lunch or dinner (not both). I don't use traditional salad dressing. I only use organic cold-pressed olive oil (again, at Sam's for a great price) with Bragg Apple Cider Vinegar. There are tons of reasons why I use this as my salad dressing, but if you are interested, you could start by reading about the health benefits of Bragg Apple Cider Vinegar here. The lettuce and dressing are my base salad to which I add all sorts of extras. I don't eat all of these at one time, but choose combinations of unsalted sunflower seeds, diced avocado, garbanzo beans (chick peas), red, yellow, orange, and green peppers, cucumbers, and tomatoes. Every once in a blue moon I'll add some chicken breast or ground beef to it if I feel I need additional protein. I do not add cheese.

Today I weigh 153 pounds (and still losing). I went from an XL top to a Small (I'm pear shaped, so my top half is smaller than my bottom half). My pant size went from a super tight 14 to a baggy 10. I'm probably an 8. I've lost 30 inches from my chest, waist, hips, and thighs (so far). Sorry, I don't have a current full-body picture. I'll get one and post it soon. This picture was taken a little while ago and I'm down eight more pounds now. Those jeans are too big now and I've completely changed my hair. Oh well, this will have to do.

Stay tuned for more details. Next, I'll post my breakfast shake recipe I use every single morning.